But You Look So Normal

Thriving Despite the Odds

Ever wondered what words sound like to those who cannot hear them? I began to get a clue with Claudia Marseille’s description when she said, “My brain was buzzing with all the new information I was able to take in with the hearing aid; I wasn’t only hearing new sounds, I was learning what things were called.”

Imagine you’re mainstreamed in school and the teacher talks while she writes on the blackboard. Imagine having to fake your responses in a group by imitating others because you were embarrassed to say that you were hard of hearing. Imagine a world in which you were unable to hear the other end of a conversation on the phone. This was Claudia Marseille world in But You Look So Normal. The title is taken from a line spoken by a high school teacher who was shocked when she told him she was hard of hearing, a term that was still popular in the 1970s.

When Claudia’s parents finally had her hearing tested, she was already four. Maybe they didn’t realize that her lack of speech came from the fact that she couldn’t hear. Despite her severe hearing loss, Claudia’s parents mainstreamed her because they wanted her childhood to be as normal as possible. Her first hearing aid, with a battery pack and a cord into her ear, made her self-conscious. That was all that was available to her. Because she was surrounded by the noise of chaos or silence, she worked hard to learn to lipread, and even though she succeeded, there were times she couldn’t hear. She loved reading, though, and she had perfect pitch, which is extremely rare in those with a hearing loss.

The author copes with bickering parents, a strange psychoanalyst father who expresses more love for his projects than his daughter, and a Jewish mother who survived the Holocaust in Munich. As a young woman brought up without religion, she explores her Jewish identity in a kibbutz and freely tells people about her hearing problems. She’s coming into her own, following her unique path, and she takes us along to experience a different way of being in the world.

Claudia emerged from her social isolation and eventually opened herself to a life of creativity and genuine love. Her story will inspire you whether you’re deaf, know people in the Deaf community, or want to open yourself to a world you have not experienced.